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Facebook Fast

This time of Lent I felt a nudge, actually more like a shake, to remove myself from Facebook and to reflect, pray and search my heart for the reasons I am part of this social media. I had been feeling uneasy about how I was using it lately and if I was getting to caught up on the outside world that it was becoming a distraction. My desire was to use this as a way to share what is happening here in the ministry NWHCM and where I fit in. I also felt I could encourage others and share the love of Jesus with those who may not know Him or needed that encouragement/truth to be shared. It has also been a place where others could encourage me since mail is out of the question here in the Mole, Haiti:) and at times even internet isn’t working stellar so seeing a simple note or post during a hard time or rough day from a friend is always a blessing to receive, but when they have become few and far between the enemy was beginning to play the mind games with me. This was the biggest reason for removal. I recognized and God and I walked through teaching and showing me different things. Things I have shared before, but even more passionate about and probably in the minority…but will share still the same.

My favorite day of the year is Easter….celebrating what our Jesus has done for you and for me. A day I remember so many years ago at the age of 12 giving my heart to the Lord and confessing before others that I believe Jesus is the Christ, the son of the living God. I remember on an Easter Sunday my first year in Dallas going forward to reaffirm my confession and commitment to Jesus. This began a time of intense learning and stripping of so many things and taught me so much in how to trust Him more, love Him more, serve Him more and seek Him more. I have to say those years in Dallas grew me in ways that I never thought possible and as only He would have it prepared me for what I am doing now. I am reminded because of His faithfulness through those years I know He is faithful in the difficulties I have now. Sometimes I forget, but He gently reminds me. I love this!!!

As I shared earlier I fasted during this lenten season to reflect on the influence this was beginning to have on me, the why, the relationships, the purpose and am returning back to continue encouraging and sharing the love and hope of Jesus Christ, but with greater caution, knowing  the enemy  is more that capable of getting a foothold as He wants to destroy, distract, demolish and devour any testimony or truth and wants to deceive you and me. My desire is to be more cognizant and intentional as to what I share and what I post. Also being more intentional about praying before I share or post as well as to what I like/love of other posts. It has crossed my heart and mind over these weeks of reflection…am I (are we) really building relationships through likes and loves? Are we really connecting with people on a deeper level of intimacy? I’ll be the first to tell you I was heading in that direction and I found it was leaving me more empty and disconnected, dissatisfied, a lack of authenticity or transparency, skipped over, friendless. You know what I mean because we’ve all done it…scroll down and hit likes without even really reading a post!! Let me ask you…How is this relational? Do we really know how others are feeling by our thumbs up sign. As one of my brothers says at times”Oh Miss Bess, ou dunt know.” 🙂

Well maybe I dunt;) But what I do know is that Jesus was born, lived His life on this earth, died and rose from the grave so that we could have life!!! Abundant life!!! He wants a relationship with you and with me. No amount of likes or thumb ups is going to build a real relationship. Think about it. Is what your heart desires is a thumbs up from a certain person or persons or is what it desires is real words with meaning, conversation, sharing of scripture with one another to build one another up. Think about it!! Pray about it!! Talk about it!!

Let me just say there is no greater relationship to have than with Jesus. 





Jesus Take My Hand

Trust in You by Lauren Daigle

Letting go of every single dream. I lay each one down at your feet. Every moment of my wandering never changes what You see. I try to win this war I confess. My hands are weary I, need your rest. Mighty warrior, King of the fight…no matter what I face Your by my side.

When You don’t move the mountain, I’m needed You to move; When You don’t part the waters, I wish I could walk through; When You don’t give the answers, as I cry out to You ; I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in You.

Truth is You know what tomorrow brings.There’s not a day ahead You have not seen; So in all things be my life and breath I want what You want Lord and nothing less.


You are my strength and comfort; You are my steady hand. You are my firm foundation the Rock on which I stand.Your ways are always higher; Your plans are always good, there’s not a place where I’ll go You’ve not already stood.

I will trust in You, I will trust in You, I will trust in You, I will trust in You!!!!

Have you ever walked in darkness? I don’t mean the kind of darkness where you have street lamps or house lights to help you find your way home, I’m talking darkness with maybe the stars and the moon to guide you and it’s a cloudy night. Or have you ever played that game where you are blind folded (and no peeking, but tied tight;) and you had to trust the person you were paired with to get you through the obstacles that lay ahead?

I recall a time while I’ve been living in Haiti where I was caught in the dark and I had forgot my flashlight. We had just finished up with a Ladies Conference and I had been talking with some ladies afterwards and as I prepared to leave the gator and everyone had gone back to the house. I was left in the dark with only the memory of the road and the stars to get me back. It was one of those nights where I lifted up a quick prayer to Jesus to help me get home safely. It was only 4 blocks away, but it was dark…really dark!!! I made it one block when I felt a gentle hand grab my arm and this precious woman who lived next door to us walked me the remainder of the way home. She was watching out for me, protecting me, shielding me and helping me back home to where there was light. I did not feel like I was in any danger and I had no fear of walking home, but my neighbor was watching out for me…she knew, but more importantly my Heavenly Father was watching out for me by sending this dear woman to lead me home…because I trusted Him.

This past year I found myself walking in a darkness again.A darkness that a flashlight just can’t help. A darkness that covered me not only physically, emotionally, and mentally, but spiritually. Let me just say when you pray “Lord, strip it all away” be prepared. There were area’s that surfaced that I thought I had dealt with long ago, but they returned with such force, deception and power and with such fatigue I had no fight left .This woman who doesn’t like to give up was ready to do just that, but I realized there is a difference between giving up and surrendering. I needed to surrender it all to God…the good, the struggle, pain, confusion, fear and the ugly. It certainly wasn’t pretty and the example I spoke about in the last blog was failing miserably. I felt I was disappointing to many or that I had tarnished my character and walk because of my own insecurities of what I believed to be true, but in the midst of what I believed was truth…God was using many to lead me back to the joy of my salvation.

I am so very grateful to those that didn’t give up on me during this time…that walked with me, listened to me and poured into me selflessly even when it was so very difficult. I am grateful for the team members that came through without you even knowing it…spoke life, encouragement and love into me as you affirmed me. I am grateful to a dear friend that heard my heart and spoke truth to me to get help. I am grateful for those that interceded for me when you had no idea what was going on, but He placed me on Your heart so you prayed!! I am grateful for Alongside, an incredible retreat and counseling center for Pastors and Missionaries…that loved on me, poured into me, taught me and equipped me with tools to walk in truth, freedom, grace, peace and more joy. (spending 2 weeks with other missionaries and pastors to see how important self-care and community is on the field and ,despite different countries, deal with the same issues. WOW!! Still processing it all!!!) I am grateful for supporting churches that care so deeply for me even when I was falling apart…there understanding of where I was as a missionary and the counsel I received…overwhelming!!! And so very grateful for a family that loves me unconditionally and supports what I am doing…even when they may not understand, they know I desire to listen and obey.

Above all a Good Shepherd that sent each of you to gently take my hand and lead me to the next step in the light along each days journey. I have this plaque on my wall that one of my Haitian sisters gave to me that says…The Lord is my Shepherd!! I can’t tell you how many times I sat on the couch and stared at those words praying that I would shake myself out of what I was in. When I came out in Aug. to the states these words were a lifeline for me. “ The Lord is my Shepherd I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside quiet waters, He restores my soul.” Psalm 23:1-3b He literally and figuratively did this for me. The Good Shepherd has held me tight and has never let me go.

The above song resonated and encouraged within me that despite the circumstances “I can and will trust in Him!!” He will be the Light in my darkness. “That I have this hope as an Anchor for my soul, Firm and Secure…” Heb. 6:19

I shared with our ladies a few weeks back the struggles I was facing. The depression I was in. The anxiety and fear I was dealing with. The health problems and emotions that I was dealing with and shared these Scriptures with them that I just shared above to encourage them that together with Christ we can defeat the darkness and walk in victory because He is ours forever!! Amen? I also shared this Scripture that really tied the message together.
“My health may fail and my Spirit may grow weak, but God remains the strength of my heart;
HE IS MINE FOREVER!!” Psalm 73:26

You may be walking in the dark right now. Maybe you feel you have lost your way. Maybe you have been sitting in the tunnel of despair and feel there is no way out. Let me encourage you to call on the the name of Jesus…the name that is above every name. Ask Him to help you; put your hope and trust in Him. Allow Him to take you by the hand and lead you to the other side of the tunnel where there is light. Where there is hope. Where there is forgiveness. Where there is healing. Where there is freedom. Where there is love. Where there is redemption.

May we be able to say with confidence…”I WILL TRUST IN YOU JESUS; I WILL TRUST IN YOU!!” 

Just Like You, Jesus

Lord I want to be just like You ‘cause she wants to be just like me; I want to be a holy example for her innocent eyes to see. I want to be a living Bible Lord that my little girl can read. Lord I want to be just like You ‘cause she wants to be just like me.”

The past few Mondays I have had the privilege of teaching Ladies Bible Study. I so love starting the week off with these precious ladies. Learning, playing, laughing, crying (ok this is mostly me;) lol, discussing, arguing (yes, we can get into some interesting arguments that to me seem totally banana’s, but to them it’s real….sometimes I forget this and have to remind myself that many of these ladies are young in their faith…grace. Amen? Sometimes too, I have to remember to take the log out of my own eye, before I can help pull the plank out of my sisters eye.) serving, evangelizing, worshipping and praying. It’s been so exciting to witness these ladies grow in the ways of the Lord. Seeing those that lead and are mature in their faith grow stronger and be the example to those that are new in their faith.

This is where the lesson Pierre and I was sharing was rooted. The week before we had one of those drawn out discussions that I felt went in circles, but in the midst of it all I listened to their hearts as God translated and gave me better understanding. After that day one verse and the song above kept swirling in my head.

The song has been a prayer of mine since 1994 when one of the swimmers I coached drove with me from Ohio to Dallas, Tx. It was a great drive, but also difficult as I knew at the end of the trip I would have to say good-bye. This precious girl had become like a daughter/ little sister to me over the years as I helped coach her, and though I did not know what God was doing in her then, a few laters she would accept Jesus as her Lord and Savior. As we crossed the border into Texas this song came on the radio. The radio had not worked for hours so to listen to this song and soak in the words it put a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes. This was the time God began to birth a deeper passion for discipleship and growing in Christ character. It still helps fuel this passion especially during seasons of struggle and confusion.

We shared with the ladies this scripture from 1Corinthians 11:1…Paul writes, “follow my example as I follow the example of Jesus Christ.” Why had Paul wrote this? Was he being arrogant or self-righteous? Paul never saw himself as sinless. In fact during this time of this writing the Corinthians knew nothing of the life of Jesus or His ministry. Paul couldn’t say, “hey look at Jesus, imitate Him, He is Your example” because the Gospels weren’t even written yet. They had no idea what Jesus was like. The best way to point these new Christians to Christ was to point them to a Christian whom they trusted. Paul had live in Corinth almost 2 years and had built relationships of trust with many of the new believers. (taken from Application Study Bible)Paul walked in Christ-like character…like the line to the song, “I want to be a living Bible Lord, that my little girl can read.”

I posed this question to the ladies…When we think of the characteristics of Christ what do we think of? It took them a couple of minutes to begin to answer, but once one of our ladies began, they were off and running. Compassionate, Forgiving, Patient, Gentle, Protector, Provider, Friend, Counselor, Peace, and on and on:) I shared with them that when I look up the characteristics of Christ I can find way over 60 traits and that I can get overwhelmed by so many, but the one place we can look for is in Galatians 5:22-23 Listing the Fruit of the Spirit and then asking ourselves Am I walking in Christ-likeness? What is it that I need to ask Jesus to help me with and who can I recruit to keep me accountable and walk alongside of me?

The week before one of the ladies shared this during our heated discussion. She shared with the ladies that she comes to Ladies Bible Study to learn more about Jesus and that she finds sisters here that pray for her, come alongside of her and offer help when she isn’t able to help herself. I reminded them of this and how beautiful it is that we can come alongside one another, study God’s Word with one another, pray for one another, grow in grace with one another, cry with one another, serve one another, laugh with one another, and keep each other accountable.

I posed another question to them…In our list do we find jealousy, envy, greed, gossip, revenge, fear judgement, anger, fear, bitterness, pity, selfishness….in Jesus? A resounding NO! NONE OF THESE!!! But do we find them in us? Oh Yes, Amen!!! We know we don’t want to admit it, but we all do. There are rooms in our heart that at we want to close off and not admit the struggle with.We all have them and unfortunately as the body of Christ we are harder on each other and on ourselves. We are good at pointing out the plank our neighbors eye before noticing we have our own log in ours. We just stink at just sitting down and being transparent with one another and saying, “hey, I notice your struggling a bit with gossip or jealousy. Can we talk about it together instead of talking about it all over town. Maybe together you decide to conquer this with Christ help.” We reminded them that they are more than conquerors with Christ Jesus!!

Lastly I asked them…How do we develop Christ character? How do we say I want to be a woman who walk in Christ-likeness and mean it? It means getting real with ourselves and others. It means doing a heart check as well as a thought check. It means getting serious about our prayers and ask for help in the problem areas that we know we struggle with. Which means if we are praying about it don’t be surprised if He places you in circumstances and experiences to teach us. In other words whenever we choose to respond to a situation in God’s way instead of in our flesh nature we develop His character. For this reason he allows conflict, disappointment, difficulty, temptations, times in the desert and delays.

We left them with this challenge…In what difficult circumstance in your life might God be trying to build your character? How does your attitude or perspective change in hearing this today? Who are you being a living Bible for?

I leave the same challenge for us all?

Living on the Edge

When you think of “living on the edge” what sort of definition comes to your mind? Dangerous living? Extreme sports? Unlawful activity? Sheer craziness? The Urban Dictionary defines this phrase like this….living a dangerous or unusual everyday life.People who live on the edge quite frequently expose themselves to physical, psychological, economical, lawful or other kind of dangers.

For the past 4 or 5 weeks we have been using this expression quite a bit, but in Haiti we use it in a different way and it revolves around our way of communication back to the states…the Internet. The cell phone company that we were using and had a reasonable monthly plan for Internet decided that the Mole didn’t have enough subscribers.

A few of you may have noticed that I haven’t been on Facebook, Voxer or returning E-mails. Basically, I was waiting to find out if this was going to be resolved. During the waiting is how we became…living on the edge, (a capital E marked the top of phone screen for EDGE;) because if you still had an active plan you could get snail mail slow,activity:)

As it so happened my plan ran out around the time this began. At first I was a bit frustrated with this, but as time passed it became somewhat freeing and made me stop and reflect on the hold, that so subtly has grabbed me. These thoughts have played on my mind…I never really checked who liked my posts and now I find myself saying,”She liked my post, Why? “Did he or she just check the like box in passing? Why doesn’t anyone ever comment? Why doesn’t this person or that person e-mail me anymore? Ive been lax in blogging and only short snippets on Facebook, how can I do better? Better yet, how can I revive my desire to write…it is so flat right now!? I haven’t been a very good daughter, sister, niece, aunt or friend at writing and (sorry;( all) at keeping up…know though, you are loved hugely, missed greatly and prayed for muchly!! I was carrying my phone everywhere as if it was attached to me and wondering who might send the next message, Vox or email…which consequently were very few and far between before this happened.I was finding the very thing I was struggling with in others was beginning to grab me as well. I let my guard down somewhat and was critical of others. Isn’t this just how satan works? He gets his foot in the door so easily and innocent and the next thing you know you are being mastered by his deceit…we fall right into his trap.

I am grateful to God for allowing me this time to “LIVE ON THE EDGE” for these weeks. It has taught me a lot.
First…that though it may sound silly, the definition still holds true. Anything can master you. Even technology! It can be just as dangerous if it takes you away from your first love…your relationship with Jesus Christ. I don’t ever want that to be the case with me and those I love.
Second…this EDGE showed me more of His grace and extending that to others. How easily we all can fall into this trap if we don’t guard our hearts and minds.
Third…to trust Him in all things. Even in the way of communication and the form of it. Whether 3G or Edge God has it all and sometimes with this speed He is instilling in us more patience. I live in a slow paced community. The Haitians are beautiful in showing me this more and more. God is teaching me through them to continue building relationships and baring fruit…fruit that will last. I don’t live in a fast food, gotta have it this second, traffic to slow kinda country:) It’s a “stop and smell the coffee” pace. Communication is key folks:)
Fourth…to be more intentional with all that I do. In the classroom. On the campus. In the community. With teams that serve.
Lastly…it’s important to keep connected but with right motives and with conversation. I need community that will encourage with words. Whether by Voxer, Facebook or by email…these are the ways for me to communicate with others. With Gods help and those who keep me accountable I am connected again now, but with a different company, but still “LIVING ONTHE EDGE” , but keeping my heart and mind alert to the trap that was laid before.

With this said…Miss Beth is back online, but at a different pace and purpose. To try to engage those I connect with (not just the like button:) to build relationships that glorify God and point others to His son, JESUS! To encourage and share His Word and His ways as He leads me.

The Church Body…

This morning our message was over Hebrews 13:16-21. It reads “And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for such sacrifices God is pleased. Have confidence in your leaders and submit to their authority,because they keep watch over you as those who must give an account. Do this so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be no benefit to you. Pray for us. We are sure that we have a clear conscience and desire to live honorably in every way. I particularly urge you to pray so that I may be restored to you soon.
Now may the God of peace, who through the blood of the eternal covenant brought back from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great Shepherd of the sheep equip you with everything good for doing His will, and may He work in us what is pleasing to Him, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen”

One of our Church leaders brought the message as our Pastor was sick and running a high fever. He encouraged our family, as we begin this New Year, to lift up our Pastor in prayer. It was wonderful to start out the New Year with the pews full and this encouraging Word.
After worship Momma Gigi asked if I was going to visit the Pastor with them. I must have missed that announcement;) I told her, of course. Usually when we visit it is 6-8 of us. When we reached the Pastors house I felt like I’d just stepped into Gods Word when the disciples or Paul would be in the home and people were packed to the seems listening. It was a bit surreal. Many of our church family were in the home as I entered. To see such incredible support brought tears to my eyes as I flashed back over the struggles we have encountered the past 4.5 years. To witness the church body praying over, singing over and encouraging this family was a great way to begin the New Year!

I ask you too, to pray for our Pastor and his family. That he would persevere and be courageous as he speaks truth in love, gentleness and humility.

Pray for our Church family that we would continue to grow in faith and would be a bold witness to the community. That His Light would shine in the darkness!

Consider Job? For Discipleship Class?

Yesterday we began another Discipleship Class for women in our community. For previous classes we have taken 20 of our Ladies in our Dames group and paired them with one of the ladies that had been sought, prayed about and asked to come. This time we are doing something a little different by using our mission staff who are also strong leaders for all of the women in the Dames group. Mama Gigi, Tezzie, M’NeNe and Elirose along with Kenson, Pierre and myself will be teaching and coming alongside this group of women.

As I said we began yesterday and as I sat down this week to prepare our first lesson I kept coming back to the book of Job. Really God? You want me to use Job? How? Why? And then…Why not!! I’ve seen to often the ladies that begin coming and then a prayer wasn’t answered, struggles were overwhelming, the enemies schemes overtook them, and they would leave going back to old ways. The ladies and I have gone out to check on those we haven’t seen , to encourage them and pray with them, but many, still wrestle with the chains that have entangled them. Each home I’ve entered my spirit senses this heaviness and battle they are in and so…We Pray!

The Example of Job
Before I jumped into Job I asked the ladies a few questions.
I asked them if they knew why they were here. Most of them said no and I shared with them that they weren’t here by accident, but that we were praying for the women in this community and that God led our ladies to them. That they were chosen. When I said this you should have seen many of their faces go from downtrodden to all smiles! My heart burst with joy!!

I proceeded to ask a few more questions. Who did they believe did the most good for all people in the world? “God” Who did they think was the greatest teacher? “God” Who did they believe in all of history lived a most holy life? “God” This was very telling to me as the name of Jesus was never uttered. They gave me blank faces when I said His name. I shared with them that no other person in History had influenced the world more for good than Jesus Christ and that He was the reason we were meeting. I shared from John 14:6 and then said…
He is the only way, only truth, and only life.
He is the key to knowledge and understanding
He is the wellspring of wisdom.
He is the foundation of faith.
He is the doorway of deliverance.
He is the pathway to peace.
He is the roadway to righteousness.
He is the gateway to glory.
He is the bridge to joy and happiness. (S.M. Lockridge, Ann Graham Lotz)

Then I explained, “we want to share with you who this Jesus is and why we love Him, why we trust Him, why we believe He is who He says He is, why when the difficulties and heartache of life hit us that we run to Him and praise Him because He is our strength. He is our refuge. He is our comfort. He is our hope. He is our peace. He is our deliverer. He is our defender. He is our song and we love and trust Him with our lives.” Then I asked them…”Are you you ready for the journey?” A resounding Yes!!!

I asked them if they knew the story of Job and most had not. A few knew the name…so Kenson read from Job 1:6-12 and began sharing the story of Job. After sharing the conversation between the enemy and God and then what proceeded to happen to Him we read from 1:21 where Job says,” naked I came from my mothers womb and naked I will leave. The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised.” He also says later, “though He slay me or though the Lord allows this…still I will praise Him!” I explained, ” ladies do you see him running from God? Is Job blaming God? Is he seeking other Gods or ways? Is he going next door to the witch doctor? Is he praying to Abraham, Issac, Peter or Paul? NO! They said. NO! He is praising the name of the Lord! ”

“Now, I said, ” if Job, who had everything, and now had nothing and had sores all over his body believed and praised God…isn’t it worth finding out more about this God, this Jesus who in Jer. 1:4-5, chose you before you were even born?” YES!!! was their reply .

I shared a little more of Job and then I reminded them how much Jesus loved them and prayed over them.


Pray for these precious ladies, our staff women, Kenson, Pierre and myself. Pray for Light of Jesus to shine in the hearts and lives of these ladies and their families and pray for the ladies that have returned to old ways and continue to struggle. Pray for roots to be dug down deep. That the anchor will hold!!!


Will You Be the One?

Therefore, go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age. Mathew 28:19,20


Be the One

In a world full of broken dreams…Where the truth is hard to find…For every promise that is kept…There are many left behind…though it seems that nobody cares…It still matters what you do…Cause there’s a difference you can make…But the choice is up to you.

Chorus: Will you be the one to answer to His call…Will you stand when those around you fall…To take His light into a darkened world…Tell me will you be the one?

Oh sometimes it’s so hard to know who is right and what is wrong…And where are you suppose to stand when the battle lines are drawn…There’s a voice that is calling out for someone whose not afraid…To be a beacon in the night to a world that’s lost it’s way.

Chorus: Yes, I’ll be the one to answer to His call…I will stand when those around me fall…I will be the one totake His light into a darkened world…I WILL BE THE ONE.


So flashback July 4thish 1995….this really seems like ages ago and now that I figure it out it is almost 20 years ago. Wow!!! Time has flown by so quickly.So why the flashback you might ask? Or maybe not:>) The past 6 weeks I have been walking after supper to unwind, breath, reflect and just spend some time with God. It’s been good for my body and good for my heart as on one of these walks He reminded me of this particular time. As I reflected, this moment was an outward praise and prayer of what He began doing in me. I remember standing in Los Colinas, Tx with 1000’s of people and singing this song and feeling I was the only person there. Singing out to Him with conviction and with and overflowing passion to be an instrument in His orchestra. “Yes, Lord…I will be the one to answer to your call…I will stand when those around me fall…I will be the one to take His light into a darkened world…YES, LORD, I WILL BE THE ONE.”

I had been thinking about how I came to this point and questioning and just tracing back to moments of significance. Moments like these. When you know, that you know, you were in the presence of God…even with 1000’s of people around. I’ve had other moments like these where I was brought to my knees or the times I could here His the small still voice, but why this moment? As I continued to walk and reflect and just press into the One who knows me I realized He was reminding me of this commitment I made to Him. You see I said Yes, Lord and when I did…I meant it with all my heart, mind, soul and strength. What I didn’t know is how. What I also didn’t know is that the journey I was on with all the struggles and uncertainty. With all the ups and downs. With the many lessons I would walk through and learn, prepared me for the unexpected. You see I always thought I would be coaching swimming until He decided to bring me home. I thought the pool deck was my mission field and the athletes, parents and coaches were those I would be sharing the Light of Jesus with.

For almost 15 years I coached with the Dallas Mustangs and that commintment I made to be the One was the mission I took. It was also a training field for me as I learned to be more bold in my faith and really learn how to share the love of Jesus. I had some very sweet moments over those years seeing the Lord teach and mold these athletes, parents and coaches. God granted me favor in so many ways in sharing my faith and also praying with the athletes I coached. I continue to pray for many of them today as my heart still breaks for those that don’t know Him. I pray that God would send other men and women of God that would lead them to Him. I pray that they would see how much Jesus loves them and that He is the only Way, Truth and Life. I pray for their hearts to hunger and thirst for Him. There are days when the enemy likes to taunt me about these kids and tell me I didn’t do enough or say enough or that I really didn’t make a difference. It’s on those days I recieve a short note or e-mail from one who tells me diffrently. I love God’s timing in this!!! I love the fact that I still have the opportunity to encourage and speak truth into these young people via e-mail, facebook or Vox.I may not be walking up and down the pool deck with them anymore, but the relationships God continues to build through prayer. I love it!!

This morning I was woken up early with a huge storm, not only outside, but inside my heart. As I laid there in bed I began thinking about these kids and their relationship with Jesus. The tears were on the verge of escaping, because they may know of Jesus, but they may not  know Him in a personal way. Then I began to think about my courageous brothers and sisters around the world who are being persecuted because they walk hand in hand with Christ. It simply made me weep even more, but with a hope. The hope of knowing that I will meet and see them in heaven. Will I see these kids, their parents or the coaches I worked with?

Today churches around the world are gathering today in buildings, under trees,in huts,  underground, in military tents that have been burned (that would be us!) in homes in silence or in undisclosed locations to worship Jesus together as one body. The day has been set aside to pray for the persecuted church and as I read and listen to  stories of those who have courageously forgiven their enemies and have died proclaiming Jesus, my heart cries out for the hurting and the lost. Times are changing fast and none of us knows what tomorrow may bring. To many of us are living in fear of the “What if” or maybe even the fear of the “When.” And then there are those that are sticking their head in the sand and denying everything that is going on the world. If we are living or paralyzed by fear are we living God’s way? His way tells us to go into ALL the world and make disciples. He didn’t say only preachers or teachers or people that went to Bible College….HE SAID ALL!! That means you and that means me!!

Friends…if you do not have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ will you begin seeking Him. He knows you!! Do you know Him? Will you repent of your sins and trust Jesus Christ alone for salvation? He is waiting with open arms…come as you are!!

If you know Him…WILL YOU BE THE ONE? Will you trust Him? Will you step out of the boat? When you keep your eyes on Him you’ll find you are able to walk on water and that He will do immeasureably more than we could ever ask or imagine!!

Remember those in prison, as if you were there yourself. Remember also those being mistreated, as if you felt their pain in your own bodies. Hebrews 13:3 PRAY!!


In the Arms of His Embrace

Psalm 143:8 “Let the morning bring me word of Your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in You. Show me the way I should go, for to You I lift up my soul.”

Sunday morning I awoke ready to spend time with my brothers and sisters in worhsip, but there was a small emptinness and ache within me that I couldn’t seem to shake. As I spent some time in His Word and in prayer I simpley asked Go to embrace me in His arms this day and experience more of His unfailing love and His Presence. My heart needed a touch from the Lord.

I got up, collected my Bible and my bag and headed out the door. As I headed toward the church and old hymn came to my mind…
“Love lifted to me…Love lifted me…when nothing else will do!!…Love lifted me.” In the arms of His embrace!!

It is interesting how those old choruses resonate in my heart and just just when I need encouoragement God brings them to my mind and sings them over me. I love how God touches and moves in this way. I was also remindedd of where these songs first took root within me and the bofdy of believers that poured into me, loved me, faithfully prayed for me, encouraged me and led me to Jesus. I can picture many of them now singing with hearts for Our Lord and Savior. I can hear their voices in my own heart. Such a sweet, sweet sound and even sweeter memories!! My roots go down deep, becasuse of the believers at Potsdam Church of the Brethern. I thank my God in remembrance of you and the foundation you poured into me as I grew in the knowledge and the accepting by faith, Jesus Christ!!! Mesi Jezi!!

I sat in service and tried hard to follow the sermon from Romans 12:1-2. It’s not that I was distracted (though I certainly can be:) , but it is always a struggle for me to understand all of the sermon in the Haitian language. I do have to say I understand a whole lot more than I did last year at this time…so I’m making progress:) Plus we had a visiting Pastor preaching and he spoke way to fast for me!!! 8) lol

As service progressed one of our ladies from our Bible study moved back to the benches that were in front of me with her 2 little ones. Her little girl who is about 3 or 4 and her son who is about 6. I hadn’t seen her kids for well over a year in church. I began making faces with the little girl who was being curious and looking at me and then hiding her face. Most of you know how I am with kids, so you can imagine the silliness we were enjoying:) She stopped for a brief moment to whisper something to her mama and then she got up and came back with me. She touched my arm and smiled and then she gave me a big hug. I picked her up and sat her on my lap and she snuggled up close to my chest and held me tight, like I’d known her forever. I haven’t had any real contact with this precious little one accept when she was born. Her mama had a difficult delivery and we really believed she might lose the baby. God thought otherwise!! Praise the Lord!!! A group of us ladies went to visit her after she was born and prayed over them and now she is growing and has such a joy within her.

As service began to finish we stood up to sing the last song. I held this little one in my arms and she embraced me tight putting her cheek next to mine. In that moment a wave of love washed over me and tears began to flow from my eyes. She stopped and looked into my eyes with such amazing love and compassion, trying to wipe away the tears then she pressed her cheek back to mine and hugged me even tighter. As she embraced me I embraced her in return praying over her, not knowing fully how her homelife was like. You see she has a beautiful mama that loves Jesus, but I also know her daddy doesn’t like them coming to our church and he has tried to cause problems in the past. As I prayed over her I felt her rest in the security of my arms. She let out a big sigh and dropped her head to my shoulder as if to say “I’m at peace and I can rest.”

My heart and her heart, this day, felt the embrace of Jesus. He answered my hearts prayer in a way I did not expect. It’s just like Him to use the life of a child with me. He knows me and knows what I need at just the right time. He lifts up my soul as I trust in His unfailing love and as He loves me He shows me how to love even deeper still. For this I am eternally grateful!! There is nothing sweeter than being in the embrace and presence of the Lord!!

Who in your cirlce of influence is in need of His embrace? Be the arms of His embrace today!!

It has been way too long since I’ve actually blogged here. I’ve been doing short little snippets…ok sometimes long:)…on my Facebook posts and I have just not been motivated to write or do anything more than this. It’s been almost a year since my last post and God has been doing some renovations in this heart of mine as I continue to love and serve the Haitian people, so you may be hearing a bit more from me in the days and weeks to come.





Will You Love Jesus More

After posting a little message about Gabe Thurs. on facebook about him running to my door at 10 at night to tell me his Bible verse and a couple other posts…I recieved some sweet e-mails, instant messages and replies to these posts. I was deeply touched and encouraged, but I also have been struggling a bit. I have never been one who was good at taking compliments. It’s hard to know what to say in return.  With all of this I began thinking of the kids I used to coach. Many who are not kids any longer. Some are married with children, some are getting ready to be married, some are attending college and some are taking steps for Grad School or finding a job. Many I still follow and keep in contact with and I am richly blessed to be able to do so. Many God brings to my heart and mind as I continue to lift them up to the Father. I have sweet precious memories of these young people. One thing that has weighed on my heart the past couple of days is their relationship with Jesus Christ or if they really know Him. The song below speaks of this…not to just them, but in all that I do. My hearts desire is for those I have the opportunity to meet and to know is that when we go our seprate ways that they will love Jesus more and some cases will they come to know Jesus!!!

Follow my example as I follow the example of Jesus Christ…I Cor. 11:1

I feel quite sure if I did my best
I could maybe impress you
With tender words and a harmony
A clever rhyme or two

But if all I’ve done in the time we’ve shared
Is turn your eyes on me
Then I’ve failed at what I’ve been called to do
There’s someone else I want you to see

Will you love Jesus more
When we go our different ways
When this moment is a memory
Will you remember His face
Will you look back and realize
You sensed His love more than you did before
I’d pray for nothing less
Than for you to love Jesus more

I’d like to keep these memories
In frames of gold and silver
And reminisce a year from now
About the smiles we’ve shared
But above all else I hope you will come
To know the Father’s love
When you see the Lord face to face

You’ll hear Him say “well done”


I’d pray for nothing less
Than for you to love Jesus more

*Phillips, Craig and Dean


Now I know in my heart and in my head that it is not me who changes the hearts of those who God places along my road. That it is He who works in the hearts of each person. It probably didn’t help my heart to sit down and watch the movie last night “Left Behind”. This life is so very short and when God calls me home I want to be able to someday see those I walked this journey with in heaven with me. I share with the Ladies Discipleship groups that many know Jesus. They know His name. They know the stories, but I ask them…Do You Know Him? Really Know Him? Then I ask them if they know the President of Haiti. I ask them if they have had conversation with him…spent time with him getting to know him. Do you know his likes and dislikes? Everytime they say no. Then I ask do you really know Jesus? Have you spent time with Him? Do you know what He likes and dislikes? Do you really know what He has done for you? He wants a relationship….He wants us to love Him more…to dig deep into His Word to get to know Him. How will you know Him if you don’t spend time getting to know Him?

So…I continue to pray believing that the young people I love dearly and miss so much will come to know Jesus in a personal and intimate way. That they will hunger and thirst for Him. For He is the Only Way, the Only Truth and the Only Life!!! I pray for the young people God has placed on my path while I am here in Haiti….American and Haitian…that they will see Jesus in us and not us. That we (I) will decrease and He will increase. That they are drawn to what Jesus is doing here and not anything we (I) have done or said. I pray that we would be Instruments in our Redeemers hands….being used for His glory and purpose. I pray for our precious little ones that they will be raised to know and love Jesus with all their hearts, mind, soul and strength. That they will be a generation that turns this country toward Jesus. That His Light will overpower the darkness that is so prevelant in this community and country.

To my kids near and far…I love you so very much, but there is One who loves you even more and it is Him I desire you to know. Will you love Jesus more? This is my continual prayer for you!!!

(This may or may not make sense…but it is what is on my heart and felt led to share:)


I do want to thank all of you that send such sweet notes of encouragement, instant messages, voxes and posts that bless my heart and remind me who’s I am and that He’s not through with me just yet. Your faithful prayers and notes lift me in ways you will never know. In my weaknesses He really is making me stronger and I am grateful for the family and friends that walk with me and help me up when my knees feel like buckling or when I am flat on the floor. You help me keep my focus when “I step out of the boat to walk on water”…You help me stay the course and keep me accountable…You’re not aftraid to speak truth in love even when it might hurt…Simply put, you show me the hands, the feet, the face and embraces of Jesus. Thank you so very much!!!


Discipleship, Decisions and Donkeys

EncouragementDiscipleship Dames Last Class                                          

Today was our last official meeting with our Discipleship Dames class. As usual I had a lesson all wrote out, but somewhere along the line my script changed as I was prompted to remind them how much Jesus loved them and how beautiful He tells them they are. No matter what they have done or what they are doing…He loves them and wants a relationship with them. Kenson and I shared with them Psalm 63:1-8 as it resonated in my heart all day today. It says.” You, God, are my God, earnestly I seek you: I thirst for you, my whole being longs for you, in a dry and parched land where there is no water. I have seen you in the sanctuary and behold your power and your glory. Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you. I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift up my hands. I will be fully satisfied as with the richest of foods; with singing lips my mouth will praise you. On my bed I remember you: I think of you through the watches of the night. Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings. I cling to you, your right hand upholds me. ” Reminding them how He longs for them seek Him, to hunger and thirst for Him and to spend time with Him.

We reviewed last weeks lesson a bit as I had shared with them the ABC’s of Salvation. A=Admit; admitting we are a sinner. Romans 3:10 and 3:23  B=Believe; believing Jesus Christ is God’s son and placing our trust in Him alone. receiving forgiveness of our sins; even though we do not deserve this gift He freely gives. John 3:16 C=Confess; confessing with our lips that we have placed our faith in Christ alone and following Christ example being baptized as an expression of our faith. Romans 10:9-10 Luke 9:23 Now we did not review every scripture, but I wanted you, the reader, to know what we spoke of last week:)

I asked the ladies if they knew the song “I Have Decided to Follow Jesus”.  I began singing and a beautiful chorus rang out as they joined with me…at this point I held back the tears…you know me:) I shared with them that deciding is just the beginning. I told them that many times as I walk through the community I will run into people who I haven’t seen in worship for a while. People that I’ve watched go forward and then be baptized. I will ask them why they aren’t coming to worship and the common reply will be, “I’ve been baptized or I’m converted” which my reply to them is from Hebrews 10:25 where we are told to not stop meeting together, but to continue having fellowship.” Confessing and baptism is only the beginning,” I told the ladies. I shared with them that the beginning is like a babe that only drinks milk, but if you don’t continue seeking Him, practicing the spiritual disciplines of prayer, worship, Bible reading or listening, fellowship with one another and serving you will continue to be that babe only drinking milk. We want to crave and mature into eating real food and the only way to do this is to keep meeting together and spending time in His Word and in prayer.

I followed up with this simple ABCD…yes, into the alphabet this week:) A=Ask; ask Jesus into your heart…Romans 10:13 B=Baptism; follow Jesus example.Romans 6:4, 11 C=Church; seek a Bible believing/teaching church, where God’s Word is the Authority being preached. Heb. 10:25 and D= Do what the Bible says. James 1:22.

I gave the rest of the service to Pastor Agenor as he brought the Word to them and used Isaiah 1:18-20, where it says,”Come now, let us settle the matter, says the Lord. Thought your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool. If you are willing and obedient, you will eat the good things of the land; but if you resist and rebel, you will be devoured by the sword. For the mouth of the Lord has spoken.” No he did not preach a fire and brimstone message, but I know it cut to the heart. He spoke in his gentle and compassionate way and gave the invitation for those to come forward to accept Jesus. One of the ladies didn’t hesitate, she jumped up and went forward. My heart so wanted to see many of the ladies come forward, but today was not that day. I could tell that there were many who were holding back, but I know God’s timetable is not mine. I can’t change their hearts, but I know the One who can. I’d be lying if I didn’t say I was a bit disappointed, but then I recalled a story I read this past week about 2 missionary ladies that served in a predominantly Muslim country. They were asked what was the hardest part of starting out in a Muslim country as 2 single women. Their reply was that they did not have one single person who gave their heart to Jesus for 10 years, but knew that  this was where they were suppose to be and now they are seeing people come to Jesus. This was a good reminder for me today and know it wasn’t by coincidence or accident that I read this story!! I love how God prepares my heart and gave me an even deeper love for these ladies. He is not finished with these ladies…so we will continue to pray for changed hearts. I pray for the one that accepted that she will be a bright shining light in this dark community…believe me…it is very hard community…that she will grow in her faith and be the example God has given her the opportunity to be.

Donkeys Given

This past Wednesday our Dames walked from our campus to Karenage with donkeys to give to the Discipleship Dames. I thought I was going to have to pull one of the donkeys as all of our ladies weren’t there yet. I took one and thought, “Oh can I do this, can I handle this animal.” Well obviously God thought NO, because by the time I reached the bridge, one of the ladies was there to take it off my hands:) Now the last time we did this our ladies walked with donkeys for 5 hours in the heat of the day down a narrow path down hill. For this time we had a different kind of challenge. As you know Wed. was New Years Day and it is also Haiti’s Independence Day so it is a big deal. In fact they celebrate this day more than they do Christmas. Well…as you can imagine a group of women, walking through town with a bunch of donkeys raises some eyebrows. Our first challenge was the wind…it was gusting pretty strong and we were walking into the wind as well as into the sand that it blew up. These are the days I need a set of goggles:) lol

Our second challenge was the many cat calls we were getting from the men on the streets. It’s funny, but I mainly noticed men out and about this day. I am assuming the women were in making the pumpkin soup (the traditional meal they eat on this day). The greatest challenge was a young man who had been drinking quite a bit, jumped onto one of the donkeys and began riding it. Tizzie, our Orphan Manager, stood there and just stared at him…didn’t say a word, didn’t raise a fist, she stood there. I was about ready to pummel the guy…ok probably not a good thing to do, but it still crossed my mind. One of the other ladies gently told him to get off and he did. The next thing I know he is jumping on another donkey. I thought it wise to stand back and let them handle it:) They did with much grace. He finally gave up and staggered down the street. At that moment I was so proud of our ladies. They showed such grace and restraint…it blew me away. Now you many think what is the big deal…well here in Haiti women and men are known to throw rocks at one another, hit, slap and even bite one another so to see these ladies showing restraint and not following the norm…Jesus is working in them!!!

We arrived in Karenage with the donkeys and it was like Christmas…praising God for the wonderful blessing He had given to each of the ladies. Seeing the village come out to see as well and to see what God had provided for these ladies. It was beautiful to stand back and watch. Momma Gigi and Madame NeNe passed out the paper work needed for each person, we took pictures, I played with the kids (no surprise there!) and Momma Gigi prayed for these ladies and the village and then we headed back home. What an incredible way to start the New Year!!

Please continue praying for these ladies, their children and the village. We do have groups coming in the days ahead that will be ministering to these very ladies. I know God’s Word doesn’t return void so I am believing these ladies will make a decision…God’s timing is perfect!!




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